Why buying home decor could be costing you more than money

Have you ever stopped and wondered why we buy home decor for our home? I’m talking about wall art, cushions, knick knacks, seasonal items for Christmas etc, candles, fancy bowls, matching bathroom accessories etc etc. Have you ever thought about how much you actually need these? I want to discuss why buying home decor could be costing you more than money.

How it used to be

I’ve never really given it much thought before but when I think back to the home I grew up in and my grandparent’s house, for example, there were never any homewares purchased. None. Ever.

In my grandparent’s home, anything decorative was usually a gift that was received at an 18th or 21st birthday, an engagement present, a wedding present, or other significant birthday. These were useful decorative items like vases for fresh flowers, additions to a matching dinner set like the gravy boat, platter etc.

My grandmother handmade everything including every item of clothing she ever wore (except maybe underwear). She crocheted and knitted cushions. She sewed old fabric into tablecloths and would embroider them. She crocheted doilies to adorn her dressing table or a spot on a small side table to feature a vase or a photo.

There were family photos everywhere like on the walls or a nook. Nothing matched. It was an eclectic mix but I always remember my grandparent’s home being warm and inviting, cosy, smelled like pineapples and there were always fresh flowers from their garden in a beautiful vase or handmade flowers from yarn or paper when fresh weren’t available.

The same as my home where I grew up. I don’t think my Mum bought any home decor when we were young. Maybe in her later years she might’ve bought a new clock or a mat but she never had cushions on the lounge, matching linen on her bed etc.

What I do remember about growing up though was our house was very clean and homely and Mum liked things spic and span.

It’s not WHAT but WHO

I love my home and I love who’s in it. My husband, children and pets. As I recently began my Spring cleaning, decluttering and organising for the year, I got to thinking about the actual stuff that is in my home.

I love a decorator cushion to change the look of a room. Neutral painted walls, curtains and bedding in all the rooms so you can easily change the look or colour of a room with cushions or artwork.

I’ve kept a lot of my mother’s and grandmother’s things, for sentimental reasons, but are they serving me a purpose? No. They are nice to look at to remember them but that’s about it. I’ve got to dust them, dust the surfaces they’re on and, when I pass, it will be up to my children to disperse of these things. Do I want that for the kids? No. Do I want our home to be the same loving, place of peace? Yes. Do I need these things in my home to achieve that? No.

I buy nearly all of my home decor secondhand, whether that’s thrifted, upcycled or from online garage sales. It might be something that just caught my eye that fits in with a theme I’m trying to achieve in my home but my home really doesn’t need that.

All it needs is somewhere to sleep, somewhere to eat, somewhere to cook and store food and somewhere to sit.

Other cultures

When you think of other cultures and how they live, they don’t even have that much.

Some cultures are nomads and they carry their homes with them. Some people live in caves because the temperature is cool. Or mud huts because they use local resources to build them. Some, like those in northern parts of the US and Canada live in igloos. When you start to think about it, they aren’t going to be adorning their homes with the latest cheap Asian imports because they’re trying to achieve a boho or coastal, Scandi look.

Have we become so focused on how our homes should look instead of how tidy and clean they should be?

Those cultures who live such a minimal lifestyle in their homes wouldn’t have the space nor the money to adorn their homes with such trival items. Why do we? They still have the same homely environment to live in and have less upkeep to maintain their homes.

It makes us feel better

Does it? Does it really make you feel better if you’ve copied a style from a magazine or trend?

Does all that dusting, arranging and continual tidying make you feel better? What about when the kids or your partner come home from work or school and dump their school bags, school notes, on the perfectly styled vignette on the dining or coffee table? Do you quickly move it to where it should go save messing up the vignette?

How are you really living your life? Are you living it like out of the page of a magazine or how you really want to live?

Kids come in and out all day with a matter of all sorts of things. My son has a rock and stick collection to give anyone avid rock or stick collector a run for their money. My teenager daughter is, well, a teenager and the last thing on her mind is organising and putting things back to where they belong. If I let it upset me every time I went looking for something in her room, I’d be a nervous wreck.

Having a room styled a particular way does make me feel better but I think it’s only because I’ve achieved that look in the magazine for a lot cheaper or have upcycled pieces for the look.

In reality, all I’ve done is make a lot of work for myself in having more furniture and knick knacks to dust, cushions that will probably only fall on the floor and the covers will need washing on a regular basis.

It costs a lot of money

Just think if you saved that money you spent on homewares, what could you buy instead? Those cheap Asian imports might only be $10 or $20 a pop but if you’re buying 2 or 3 every week or every time a new catalogue comes out, that adds up to $20 to $60 a week. This over the course of a year could be a week’s holiday, a new TV, the start of an investment fund etc.

Even if you buy these things secondhand, which I always do and you will always find the latest homewares ending up on online garage sales or in the thrift shops, you still have to maintain them, that is clean them, dust them etc and put up with the space never looking perfect like it does in the magazine. That’s just an unexpected reality, especially if you have children. (Might be a different story if your children have grown and left home.)

It costs a lot of time

Just think of all that extra stuff you have to deal with. Cushions and knick knacks etc that have to be cleaned and made room for. Is your home just a storage space for these things instead of being a living space?

Could you imagine your home without them? What if you just had a lounge and a coffee table that kept a couple of books or board games. Does it need all the decorative cushions or items on the coffee table to make it a nice space for your family? No. The lounge suite is still serving a purpose as is the coffee table. All the stuff on it? Maybe not. It’s not going to make a difference to how your family interact. It’s only going to give you more to look after.

Imagine if you could blitz through the housework without having to dust a single knick knack again in your life? What if you only had the bare minimum of furniture in your home? Would that free up more ‘me time‘ in your life to do things you’d rather be doing? I bet it would.

What are all those things you’ve wanted to try or get back into doing? Reading, craft, crochet, knitting, macrame, starting your own business, whatever.

The cost to the environment

Where does all this stuff end up if no one wants it? New styles are coming out every year. One for each season. People change their minds on the kind of style they want in a room more often than the weather changes. If it’s not donated, it usually ends up at the tip and as land fill.

Just like I mentioned above about my grandparent’s and parent’s homes, they made do with what they had. It was the one style their entire lives. If something broke, they fixed it.

Admittedly, magazines back in those days were useful to read. They were full of home hints, recipes and sewing, knitting or crochet patterns. Not like the magazines of today which are full of ads, for, you guessed it, new home decor and articles on how to achieve different looks in your home, among other useless information.

According to a www.news.com.au article, the weight which is the equivalent of 3.4 million KMart, cheaply made coffee tables is taken to landfill every year and that is in the Greater Sydney area alone and that doesn’t include those items which are illegally dumped.

It costs you nothing if you find JOMO

I’ve spoken about JOMO before. The joy of missing out. If you were never influenced again by a magazine, an interior decorating show or Instagram influencer, just imagine how much free space you’d have in your mind to focus on other things. Things like keeping your home tidy, enjoying family time, finding me time for yourself, pursuing your goals and your personal interests.

You’ll no longer be influenced into thinking you need a particular style of decor for your home. You won’t be spending unnecessary money on knick knacks and trinkets to decorate your home. You’ll have what you need and you’ll still have a cozy, warm and inviting home for your family.

What will you keep and what will you get rid of? Are you ready to part with unnecessary clutter in your home just because it was in a picture you saw in a magazine or on social media? How much will you and your family benefit from it?

7 ways to improve your home life

Social media has a lot to answer for these days. Sure. It has it’s positives but it’s got it’s negatives too, in a big way. It’s affecting how we live and how we perceive we should live our lives. We, as humans, have lost our ability to think for ourselves, be happy with what we have and are so influenced by bright shiny objects on social media. If you’re in a rut and sick of trying to ‘keep up with the Joneses’, here are 7 ways to improve your home life.

If you’re unhappy with your current home or the situation you’re in, then with a change in mindset you’ll soon start to love the home you’re in and start enjoying your home life more. I hear people say that they hate the house they live in, it’s not big enough, “I’ll just go and buy ‘xyz’ from KMart” and it will improve it. Buying stuff, cluttering your home and spending money unnecessarily will only add to your grief and it creates a spiral of out of control debt and consumerism. 

There is another way and it’s so easy. 

There is joy to be found in missing out

You may have heard of FOMO (the fear of missing out). Well, there’s also JOMO, the joy of missing out. 

Learn to be happy within your four walls. Learn to be happy with your life by not worrying what she’s having. There was a time when we lived our lives. When we discovered what it was that we wanted to do when we left school. We’d find partners, buy or rent a property and live together.  We’d decorate our homes based on things we liked not how other people did it.

Sure, we may have got inspiration from the current magazines or borrowing a book from the library but not how we are so influenced by people on social media today. The fact that I’m not influenced by anyone on social media I am at ease and confident with my own tastes.

Really, the only inspiration I’ve had is from my mother and grandmother. I learnt how to decorate, for example, like they did. It wasn’t even about having new furniture or the latest homewares. It was more about making do with what you already had, making over an old piece of furniture purchased secondhand or just go without until you could afford something you really wanted, or should I say, needed.

It’s actually quite a relief to be an individual and not follow what everyone else is doing. There is no stress that I can’t find it or have to spend money to buy it. I’d rather have a comfortable, clean, cosy home than one that is filled to the brim with decorator items because someone posted a picture on social media that it was their latest hack from KMart.

Unfollow

As simple as that. Unfollow those people who you envy on social media who seem to have it all together. Those people who have all the designer clothes and shoes and immaculate homes. Why spend your days worrying about what you can’t have and worry about what you already do have?

Discover yourself and your likes and dislikes and run with it. You’ll feel so much better that you have implemented your personal tastes in your home and for yourself.

A picture really doesn’t tell the true story. An image posted on social media really is only a snippet into people’s lives that very minute of that day. You never know what’s going on behind the scenes. The image might look nice and appealing but is it making you feel better or useless, unworthy or a failure? 

Just click unfollow and, if you must, follow people who are more your style. In fact, have a good social media detox. Step away from it for a while and learn what it is that really makes you tick as a person.

Be grateful

I bang on about this all the time but, for me, identifying everything I need in my life comes from three basic needs, food, clothing or shelter. I’m not talking about my emotional needs here (although food, clothing and shelter still do have a part to play in enhancing your emotional needs) but rather my immediate physical needs.

If it doesn’t fall into food, clothing or shelter and I don’t need it, I don’t get it. I’m grateful every day for my current life. Life certainly has thrown me some curve balls over the years but I’m grateful for where I ended up.

I have a roof over my head, clothes on my back and food in the cupboard. 

As far as my emotional and spiritual needs go, I’m extremely grateful for where the Universe has gotten me to. I went through a lot to finish up with the most wonderful man by my side, my two children and my pets. I’m still working on my self esteem but getting there and I’m extremely grateful for where I am in my life today.

Find beauty in the simple things

All too often we get caught in a trance, rolling through our Facebook or Instagram feed at everyone else’s sunset pictures we forget to take a look outside at the sunset that is right outside our door.

Remember what it was like to run barefoot through the grass? To smell that summer rain after a hot day? To pull out a batch of freshly baked cookies from the oven? No amount of social media influence can provide you with the joy these simple pleasures gives you.

Whether it’s holding your teenager’s hand, reminding you of when they were a toddler relying on you for guidance and help or listening to your partner after their bad day at work, find joy in the simple things in life that help you realise that you’re helping someone else which in turn will make you feel better.

Put your mobile device down and find your own joy in your own world. Don’t be envious of other people’s holiday snaps to a lovely beach location. Go out and make your own fun and live your own adventures.

Recycle, reuse and DIY

Before you even think about going to the store to buy something you need for your home, do you have something already that would work, can you recycle or reuse something already in your home or can you make it yourself.

I’m not what you would call a ‘greenie’ at all but something that I learnt from my parents and grandparents was that if you can make do with what you’ve already got, you’re winning in so many ways. You’re saving money and the environment but you’re finding joy in making something yourself.

Recycling helps protect the environment. It reduces the need for extracting (mining, quarrying and logging), refining and processing raw materials. All of these create substantial air and water pollution. As recycling saves energy it also reduces greenhouse gas emissions, which helps to tackle climate change. (Source)

Hand crocheted flower arrangement circa early 1900s, Australia. Women took great pride in creating items to decorate their homes. On display at Wolston Farmhouse, Wacol, Queensland

With so many tutorials and information available to us now, it’s near impossible not to be able to learn how to DIY a project. Whether that’s sanding an old piece of furniture and painting it, reusing or repurposing previously loved linen or creating a brand new piece from scratch like a hand crocheted rug in the exact colour you want or making your own clothes.

You’ll feel proud that you made it yourself and it will bring joy to your home life. You will look at it fondly and it will be an original. You won’t be copying what anyone else has done or bought from a discount store which has been mass produced. Even though it might be a bargain, really, is there a better way you could fill the need in your home? No amount of shopping, spending or copying others is going to bring you true joy to your home life.

Making Do

This isn’t a term I hear a lot of lately but it’s one I grew up with. I can remember moving into my own apartment after coming out of a bad relationship. I was in a new job so not a lot in savings. My sister gave me a bright orange vinyl dining set, an old 1970’s style day bed for my lounge and I think I had an old cardboard box with a tablecloth on it to hold my television.

Did I mind? No. I was extremely grateful for my sister giving me these things. I didn’t want to rush out and go into debt just so I could furnish my apartment. I was extremely happy because I had what I needed for free.

After a while, Mum was going to throw an old timber dining table that she had used for planting pot plants and I said I’d take it. I sanded it back (having never picked up a sander before) and varnished the timber. I eventually bought 4 dining chairs and a “baker’s stand” to match. The old day bed stayed and I think I got a small TV cabinet for my TV. 

Storage baskets in my laundry area. Many years old. None of them match. Have been reused and repurposed for so many different projects in my home. They are doing the job.

Everything worked and it worked well. You know the old saying “if it ain’t broken, don’t fix it”? Well, that’s how I live my life and it brings me great joy. I feel exhausted thinking about how young people today are in too much of a hurry to go out and buy a whole house full of furniture, plus decor items just to set themselves up. I’m not saying all young people do it. There seems to be a movement in recycling and upcyling, which is great, but there is still a lot of people who live with the thought that they need these things to improve their home life. You don’t.

Make do with what you’ve got until you can afford what you need. This applies to all areas of your home life from cooking to home decor.

Stop Comparing

My husband and I were only discussing the other night about how we all compare our lives to others. My children (he is their step father) are great kids and very grateful but they take some things for granted. My daughter is extremely lazy and untidy and I told my husband that most teenage girls are like this. We got talking about it and thought it doesn’t have to be. We have the right to run our household the way we want to and if my daughter doesn’t conform nor respect our property, there will be consequences. We started looking at comparing in another light.

I think it’s human nature to compare your life with others. I look at women who are naturally slim, who have had a baby and they probably only put the weight of the baby on while they were pregnant and you wouldn’t have even thought she’d had a baby. WRONG! Why would I compare my pregnancy to hers? She was probably 20 years younger than me. She may have had the worst pregnancy with all sorts of complications, who am I to know? Did she walk in my shoes or me in hers? No. Comparing is one of the worst things you can do to make you feel sad about your life and, in particular, your home life.

It’s like comparing oranges to apples. No two people have walked the same steps in life. Develop your own tastes. Find your own style. Once you have, you won’t need to worry about what other people have or are doing. 

JOMO - The Joy of Missing Out

You may have heard of FOMO (the Fear Of Missing Out) or DOMO (some Japanese cartoon character) but have you heard of JOMO, the Joy of Missing Out? It’s a condition I have and one I don’t suffer from, at all.

What is JOMO?

The Joy of Missing Out is a term I stumbled across in a meme and when I saw it I thought it summed me up perfectly.

For as long as I can remember I’ve never been one to ‘jump on the bandwagon’ when something new comes out, a new television program is released or a new movie/book or craze, for example.

It’s been quite rewarding to think that I don’t have to worry about keeping up with what everyone else is doing. Making sure I keep up with the latest episode of that particular program, making sure I run out and buy that book that everyone is reading or visiting that latest food truck craze that everyone seems to be raving about, for example.

Don’t follow trends

It’s so exhilarating to think that I’m not tied to trends. The latest brand of fashion being promoted by social media influencers are ignored. The latest recipe craze of using chocolate bars to using in baking because it might seem easier or there seems to be some nostalgia tied to it, for example. To me, that’s not a craze, that’s just crazy!

I can’t even remember exactly when the worldwide phenomenon “The Game of Thrones” TV program came out. Everyone was, and still is, raving about it. Only earlier this year we saw it advertised for free on our TV subscription, watched a couple episodes and wondered what all the hype was about.

Don’t be a ‘bandwagon jumper’

The joy of missing out means I don’t have to add another thing to my already full list of things to try, see or buy. The same applies to when “The Fifty Shades” series of books came out. I can remember everyone going crazy about it. I didn’t jump on the bandwagon because I just didn’t want to. I love being different and free from following what everyone else is in to.

Sure, I use social media for inspiration especially when it comes to cooking. I have my favourite TV shows or movies but I’m not tied to them. If I miss an episode, I miss an episode.

Throw away the junk mail

There’s something quite exhilarating about not looking at the junk mail too. What I don’t know is on sale won’t hurt me. There’s nothing I need. If it’s not shelter, food or clothing then I don’t need it. If I do need one of those things, I’ll get what I can afford or spend the least amount of money on it as possible because I would rather spend my money on experiences, not stuff.

The companies that use the junk mail to market their specials are very clever at creating emotion into thinking you need something. To think that I’d have to go to KMart every time a new catalogue or new range is released would frustrate me no end. How would I find the time to do what I need and like to do? What about the extravagant waste of money? The junk or useless products you’re bringing into your home just because a company suggests you do is only going to clutter your home and give you extra things to dust.

It’s not the end of the world if you miss it

Sure, I have and have had my favourite TV programs over the years but if I miss it, I’ll get around to watching it or I won’t. It’s not the end of the world. I’m happy with my style in home decor or clothing. I think it’s pretty individual and a mix and match style that changes if I change. I won’t let my style be dictated by anyone or any company.

I didn’t have a mobile phone until my daughter was born. I didn’t feel I needed one before that. I know people who’ve had them since they were invented. I was born at a time when if you were out, you used a telephone box or it waited until you got home.

The JOMO Book

When I googled ‘JOMO’, I found out that it’s actually a book written by a Canadian woman, Christina Crooke. I haven’t read it but I’m going to try and get my hand on a copy. I’m not sure there’s anything in there I don’t already know but it will be an interesting read anyway.

Try it – what have you got to lose?

If you try JOMO you’ll find you’ll have more time on your hands. You’ll be aware of finding your own style, enjoying what you’ve already got without having to buy something new or what everyone else is buying. I’m not saying if you really love the shoes, buy the shoes but don’t feel that because someone suggested it and you don’t need new shoes, don’t feel obliged to buy them because of that reason. You’ll also be more in tune with what you like and your surroundings. It’s such a liberating feeling that you’re not tied to anything or anyone.

Instead of having FOMO, the Fear of Missing Out, why don’t you try JOMO. It might just free up a lot of stress in your life and your wallet.