Happy Mother’s Day to all the Mums who are celebrating today. As much as this is a time of reflection for me, having lost both my mother and, more recently my beloved mother-in-law, it’s very much a time of reflection for me and how far I’ve come in my mothering journey. I guess the best way for me to know I’ve done okay is to look at my children now, how they’re growing up and how they act in society. 

One thing I know for sure, I know how to mother my own children. That is it! I don’t know how to mother your children or anyone else’s. That’s your job and we all do it to the best of our abilities. I know, right from the start, I found mothering very difficult. I set myself such high expectations on how easy it was going to be and how well I was going to do. Nothing could be more further from the truth. My daughter had colic and that was a terrible time for me and her. I wanted to keep my house looking spotless and be a mother to my children but I couldn’t do it. I felt I was having a nervous breakdown. I got help from the nurses and social workers from my local Maternal Child Health Centre and they taught me to mother first and not worry about anything else. From that point on, I focused on my children first and still do to this day.

That’s what my mother did. Even though, at times during my life, my mother annoyed the heck out of me but I always held her in the highest regard. Not until I was a mother myself did I realise just how much she sacrificed and did for me and my two sisters. She always put us first. She never complained and always spoke highly of us. There were probably times she whined to her sister or neighbours about our poor behaviour because there was plenty of that but she never spoke down about us.

All too often, in this modern age of social media, mums are quick to share how hard being a mum is and how poorly behaved their children are. I’m not denying that my children aren’t perfect but I don’t publicly shame them on social media. The thing we have to keep in mind is that social media will be around for a long time and once those words are out there, they’ll be there for eternity. Could you imagine how demoralising it would be for your child, someone who holds you in the highest regard, to see those words in years to come?

[Tweet “#HappyMothersDay #mumstheword #motheringwithheartandjoy Cherish your children and only speak kindly of them. @modernwifelife31”]

One thing we know for sure, mothering and parenting is hard. That’s what it is. It’s challenging, tiring, never ending, exhausting, frustrating and the children can be downright annoying at times. But on the other hand, it is the most rewarding, pleasing, loving, honourable and privileged job in the world. No child deserves to be publicly shamed on the interwebs whether that’s through social media, blogging or even the spoken word. There seems to be a universal language between Mums, well, those who are honest anyway, that we’re all going through the same things and fighting the same battles with our children every day. Let’s support each other and lift each other up. Let’s discover ways how we can work through them so we raise kind, loving children. Not children who are spiteful, regretful, disappointed and ashamed. It’s not funny and your adult children won’t find it funny.

This Mother’s Day I’m teaming up with my lovely blogging pal here in Australia Belinda from Modern Wife Life 31, herself a mother of a beautiful 2 year old little girl, who herself has struggled with trying to conceive and like me, knows how hard it is to fall pregnant, hold on to a baby and deliver that baby to full term. We are both truly blessed to have living, breathing children who we can hold, love and cherish. We’re hosting a linky party where you can share your stories of motherhood, stories of your mother or your positive experiences on being a Mum. 

Let’s keep the bad words to ourselves, only speak highly of your children and remember that “mud sticks”. Once the written word is out there, it’s hard to take it back. Remember that mothering is hard, end of story. That’s what it is. Your children will only be with your for such a short time. My daughter is 12 years old this year and I can’t believe it. She goes to high school next year and already I can feel her starting to slip away from my cuddles and long talks. She’ll be gone and living as an adult quicker than the blink of the eye and in all my hopes and dreams, all I can say is I did my best raising her, that she will become a decent human being and that she’ll never have to worry about reading any bad things I’ve said about her on social media in years to come. So, today and every day #mumstheword when it keeps to airing our grievances about our children. Let’s keep these negative thoughts to ourselves and make #motheringwithheartandjoy our focus.

Thank you for linking up and I hope you all enjoy your Mother’s Day.